By the end of the day I felt as though I had crossed a threshold. While much of my focus the last 10 days as been trying to get past the discomfort of what I am doing and fighting my mind into telling me to call it quits, I feel as though I have reached a place where those things have been made silent.
Yes, I have had a deep sense of spiritual growth over the last few days, but I cannot deny what my body and mind have been fighting. It seems the physical importance and value of those things have begun to diminish.
I can now spend the next 30 days only focusing on the things of God.
My final thoughts of the day we're on Jesus. We don't really know what went on during his fast. There was no blog about his day to day experience. I've gained a deep sense of appreciation for what he must have been going through. He was in the wilderness. Alone. No comfort of a bed or climate-controlled house. No bottled water. No Bible to pick up at a moments notice or a journal to scribble his thoughts down. He was alone.
I am burdened for the sense of loneliness he must have been feeling. Though he walked this earth beyond that time up to his death, he spent so much time giving and ministering. Yes, many showed him great love, admiration, and worship, but as people do, they forgot about him, and ultimately a majority called for his execution.
It makes me wonder if there is a place for loneliness in our lives. Is it a place we may need to periodically come to. When we are lonely, we look at the world in a different way. We examine our relationships. We decide that once this desolate feeling ends that we will better prioritize things in our lives.
When we are alone, we realize the only thing we have is God. This is the ultimate benefit. We always have Him. Our human nature and the busyness of life tend to pull us away. A deep sense of loneliness and longing brings us back to that place of needing God. It forces us to become intimate with the Father once again.
We may feel alone, but He is there. Even though we may walk through these valley's of shadow and death, He is with us.
Thanks for continuing to share you heart with us. Ive been sharing your story, Even telling unsaved people and they look at me like "Say what?!?!" Lol Keep it up! And remember the Kavanaughs are praying for ya daily!
Thank you Megan. Hearing that presses me to keep going!